I am the last of my species, and I know how that weighs on the heart so don't lie to me!

I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! Saving the world with meals on wheels. The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.…hey.…the good things don't always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.

I'm the Doctor. Well, they call me the Doctor. I don't know why. I call me the Doctor too. I still don't know why. You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time!

They're not aliens, they're Earth…liens!

*Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I'm a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! I'm the Doctor, I'm worse than everyone's aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I'm introducing myself.

1. Aw, you're all Mr. Grumpy Face today.
2. You've swallowed a planet!
3. You hate me; you want to kill me! Well, go on! Kill me! KILL ME!

You know when grown-ups tell you 'everything's going to be fine' and you think they're probably lying to make you feel better?

I hate yogurt. It's just stuff with bits in. Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I've always known him: Jeff. All I've got to do is pass as an ordinary human being. Simple. What could possibly go wrong?

• I'm nobody's taxi service; I'm not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship.
• You hate me; you want to kill me! Well, go on! Kill me! KILL ME!
• Saving the world with meals on wheels.

You hit me with a cricket bat. I am the last of my species, and I know how that weighs on the heart so don't lie to me! Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there's an escaped fish. Did I mention we have comfy chairs?

Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there's an escaped fish. You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? No… It's a thing; it's like a plan, but with more greatness. No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister.

It's art! A statement on modern society, 'Oh Ain't Modern Society Awful?'! I'm nobody's taxi service; I'm not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool.

You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister. Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I've always known him: Jeff.

Annihilate? No. No violence. I won't stand for it. Not now, not ever, do you understand me?! I'm the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm - and you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn't you? You've swallowed a planet!

No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister. It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. You hit me with a cricket bat. Saving the world with meals on wheels.

It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I'm a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister.

I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister. Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister.

Aw, you're all Mr. Grumpy Face today. It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I've always known him: Jeff. Aw, you're all Mr. Grumpy Face today. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I'm a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do!

I'm nobody's taxi service; I'm not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. Aw, you're all Mr. Grumpy Face today. Saving the world with meals on wheels.

They're not aliens, they're Earth…liens! I'm nobody's taxi service; I'm not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush. They're not aliens, they're Earth…liens!

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